Why is it that my husband can spot a camouflaged deer standing 500 yards away, but he can't manage to see his suitcase that is STILL sitting in the living room where he left it exactly one week ago? When we returned from Michigan last Sunday, I immediately unpacked my luggage, putting all of the contents back in their rightful places, whereas my husband dropped his suitcase and garment bag by the front door and left it there. I mean, I know he HAS to see it. He's gotten into the case many times to retrieve items throughout this past week....plus, I have shifted the suitcase several times so that it blocks his path. But will he put it away? No, the man just steps over it! In fact, I went away for the weekend and left 3 simple instructions for him, one of which was to clean up his travel remains. Unsurprisingly enough, when I returned home, I saw that they were exactly where I had left them. Does he think that the bellhop fairy is going to escort his bags to his room? Or perhaps he thinks that if he leaves his belongings there long enough, I will (although wild with rage) put his things away for him?
    Visions of returning from our honeymoon are zipping through my mind like flashbacks from a bad dream. He left his suitcase AND carry on sitting out (STILL PACKED) for an entire month before I angrily heaved them up the stairs and tossed them into the closet. It's honestly to the point where I'm willing to pay flight attendants to intentionally lose his luggage, just so we can avoid this issue altogether. It would be worth it just to be able to lay my head down at night and know that there isn't a suitcase growing mold in the living room. When he actually gets around to moving it, the floor underneath is probably going to be a different color. Bad eyes or not, this time this fairy won't be suckered into cleaning up for him. The final step is me moving his bags into the middle of the yard. Maybe when the tractor shreds his undies he'll realize that the front door is not his closet!

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